little joys.

coffee

– Lots and lots and lots of coffee to get through a full-time office job.

– reading the bible with husband before the sun comes out (and he rushes to work, boo).

– car windows down, singing “unwritten” by natasha bedingfield on the way to work. (the hills tried to ruin that song and turn it into a cliche. whatever i love it.)

– laughing with new coworkers.

– lunch in the sunshine with mom.

– the fragrance of daffodils and the feel of the evening breeze.

– soft big blankets to cuddle up in and a beautiful movie to watch when husband is late coming home from work.

– our new home, filled with possibility. 

– a lawn full of crocus.

– A happy day.

be fearlessly authentic.

You know what I’m tired of?

Fake.

Posed.

Perfect.

You know what I’m talking about…it’s the over-styled lives and people all over Instagram, Pinterest and Facebook. I understand seeking inspiration…but this has really crossed a line.

I realized that I no longer feel inspired when I look at my feed.
Instead I feel…

incompetent,

imperfect

and not good enough.

Instead of being inspired, I fall into the comparison trap. I am so so truly happy for those women that can get it all done and look awesome while doing it (please don’t read this as women bashing!). But personally, being “on” and picture worthy all the time just isn’t my cup of tea. So yesterday I went through my “following” list on Instagram and unfollowed a lot of people. Anyone “perfect” – with perfect white walls, white teeth and thousands of dollars in their clothing budget. Then I went through and found people who filled their feed with real life, experiences and adventures. Not that millions of outfit pictures or styled home images are bad…they are just that – styled. I want to be inspired by real life. Real situations and real people. What if we were real? What if we took pictures that made us happy? Instead of pictures we thought would get a lot of likes.

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So here’s me:
Restarting.
Reevaluating.
Creating a lifestyle of genuine love, and sweet moments.

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I want to create a life of emotions – not items. I created a new Pinterest board called, The Beautiful Ordinary (click for link). Each photo (though extremely beautiful in their own right) portray an emotion. I’d love for you to look at that board and truly think about each feeling the pictures emote.

31dad535f4baa76b6fb5c16c1b7c81c7Do you fill your life with those kinds of vibes? If not, WHY NOT? Those are the things we remember. Not our house decor or that coffee we bought with the perfect foam leaf.

WE REMEMBER THE FEELS.

So every day we need to be making the feels!

Live a deep life, friends. How do you celebrate the beautiful ordinary? I’d love to hear your thoughts and ideas!

xo.

{P.S. All of these pictures’ sources are on my Pinterest! If you want to link back be sure to check out my Beautiful Ordinary Board.}

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Pain.

Maybe I’m crazy, but raw emotions inspire me.

A friend of mine recently broke up with her boyfriend. It was painful beyond belief. Once a little time had passed, I told her how legitimately excited I was for her. I envisioned her standing at the edge of the ocean waves, gazing ahead at an unknown beautiful future. It was a, “You’re a blank canvas! Let’s see what God can do!” pep talk that I felt down to my very core.

An end…a change – especially once that includes immense emotion – is an incredible thing. It can incite new people, experiences and expressions.

It’s as if the tears have washed away any element of agenda or caution. And your hands, weak from the sobs, are spread wide open. Accepting. Welcoming. Inviting.

They wash away bias and assumptions. Until your mind, numb, having forgone waves and tumults and heartaches is now – calm. Like a cool lake on a summer’s day, ready to be disrupted by a skipping stone or a wild cannonball leap. And those stones and leaps are actually visions of dreams you never knew you had.

Pain opens your heart.

Emotion lets in deeper life.

I once dated a man with whom I very rarely revealed my disagreement or hurt. I smoothed everything over and pushed my embarrassment or opinions down deep into the recesses of my heart. Because if I did express my true feelings we would fight and it wouldn’t be pleasant. “It might ruin this special date“, or “I don’t want to create an awkwardness between us as we walk into this party”. That was the worst relationship of my life. I felt trapped. And when I finally did express everything that I’d been covering up – it was too much for him to handle and we ended things. I am so thankful for that end. For that pain.

I’ve learned that it’s ok to ruin the evening. And it’s ok for your friends to see your tear stained face. Because an evening or an hour is just that. And it’s not worth sacrificing the future.

When my David and I have a dispute, I welcome it. (Mind you, we’re careful with our words…because you can’t get those back) Because those arguments, fights and disagreements are open doors to a deeper communication and stronger relationship. If we were never honest with one another, if we never communicated or shared – our relationship would be hollow. And if those discussions get heated – if we yell, if I cry – that only creates a sweeter communion when we’re on the other side. Yes, it might ruin an evening or even a week if it’s a doozy – but that’s worth it. Because this man, this relationship, this heart is worth it.

Pain is an open door. Don’t be afraid to follow the Lord as He leads you through it. I promise you will be stronger, happier and whole on the other side.

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